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Subscribe to this list via RSS Blog posts tagged in Patience
Teaching Kids About Money, Part 1 Families have different views on how they spend their money. This post is not written to tell you how to spend your money. These are just ideas for you to think about, tweak, and make fit your own family. One foundational issue with money and how to use it is about gratification. Should we quest after instant gratification or delayed gratification? As parents, we want to help our children think through this as they mature. There is a spectrum: Spend Thrift ---- to ---- Skin Flint (always instant gratification ---- to ---- always delayed gratification) Generosity is somewhere between those two. And money is just one of many areas that we can teach the concept of gratification (food, sex, rest, etc.). Each family has their own goals and principles to teach their kids about money. For instance, in our family, we want to teach a general stance of delaying our own gratification...
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Posted by on in Parenting
Helping Children with Fear A Rule of Thumb: Take children's fear as a very real event for them, even if what they are afraid of doesn't exist (e.g. a monster under the bed). A monster may not be real; but the fear is. In looking at the brain developing according to age, a preschooler does not have the logic of an adult. Therefore, using logic to talk them out of their fears will not work. This is where compassion and comfort come in. For instance, in the scenario of walking across a slotted bridge with narrow cracks, as long as a child can see through the cracks, they think they will fall through. (Some children may be oblivious to this.) An appropriate response when the child is afraid would be to pick them up and carry them, not try to reason with them about the slots. In very non-scientific terms, this is what happens when...
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Posted by on in Cognitive Development
Three Rules for Development Have you given up on your New Year's resolution already? Here are three rules for you and your children as you attempt growth and development together.   Rule 1: Break it down into doable steps. The Montessori model is an excellent example of this.  For example, in teaching a sport in which you hit something with an instrument in your hand -- baseball, racket sports, paddle sports, etc. -- there are steps.  The same rule applies to adults who are trying to break a habit. Break it down into doable steps. Want to lose weight? Figure out various steps, each of which can be done.    Rule 2: Start easy. We don't start teaching the alphabet by giving the child all 26 letters at once. Teach one letter, celebrate, move on. In learning matching games, start with one pair. Increase.  Note: We all need encouragement, no matter what age. The experience...
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Growing Families: Avoiding Sibling Rivalry Working toward avoiding sibling rivalry is really teaching a life skill. As your family grows, there are ways to prepare older children for the arrival of the newest addition and to get them through the toddler years when baby becomes a little explorer. It is important to be truthful when preparing the older sibling for the arrival of a younger sibling. Try to avoid saying something that would be confusing like, "the baby will be so much fun to play with!" The baby won't be playing with anyone for a while. More helpful things to say might be, "We will need to be gentle with the baby's tiny little hands. I could use your help at bathtime. Would you like to wash her feet?" When baby comes, teach the older child how to hold the baby explaining how to support the head. Sit with them and read a story together.  The older...
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Finding Focus: Ways to Increase Attention Span The development of the ability for delayed gratification can be done from an early age. Increasing one's attention span will eventually affect many aspects of life from saving money to controlling a temper or facing temptation to do the wrong thing. It is important to start at the beginning. The fact is the younger the age, the shorter the attention span. Infants have needs that should be met immediately. They need to know that their needs will be taken care of and this is exactly where they should be at developmentally. Toddlers have enough ability to wait with distraction or accept help to accomplish the thing for which they're waiting. Preschoolers can be stretched to increase their ability to wait with some help. If you're curious where your child's attention span is at, try this little test... Place a raisin or M&M under a cup making sure your child sees what...
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Posted by on in Uncategorized
They’re in doubt, so point it out. Children do not automatically know things. We wish they did. Sometimes we think they do. But often times young children – and all of us for that matter – do not know something that we think they understand or we think that we’ve communicated clearly… but did the message come through really? They’re in doubt, so point it out. Point out how they can communicate that they want or need something. Children come into this world knowing nothing. In fact, at first all they are trying to do is get their needs met. Crying is the only available option of communication. Then they become toddlers who discover that, hey presto!, snatching that toy just got their needs (or wants) met. Whining, complaining, shouting, tantruming (that may not be a real word, but we know what it is!)… there are many forms of communication to choose from which all accomplish the goal...
Tagged in: parenting Patience
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If They Repeat It, They'll Likely Complete It When Kirby Worthington, co-founder of Growth and Giggles, was working toward her Master’s degree, she spent time as a director of a Montessori preschool. She had read research on repetition and decided to test it out. On a very cold winter’s day, after three days of freezing rain and no outside playtime at school, the sun came out and it was time to go outside again. However, under the swing there was a giant mud puddle full of the freezing rain. Before going outside she gathered the children and told them: “We’re going to get to play outside, and you can play on any of the equipment – except no swinging today”, and she explained about the puddle. As they went out the door, she stopped each child asking them, “Where are you NOT playing today?” And they would repeat back to her, “No swinging and no playing in the mud.”...
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Posted by on in Parenting
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There are a number of helpful rhymes that Kirby, our resident expert, has come up with to aid us in remembering key concepts of child-rearing and development. We’ll be covering a few of them in the weeks ahead and will start off with this clever ditty:   After a recent move from the United Kingdom to the United States, my eight year old has taken to labeling herself as a “tomboy”. I’m not really sure what she means by it. I observe that she doesn’t enjoy sports as much as I did when I was a child. However, she has switched out her skirts for shorts or pants to fit in more with the culture around her. When does a stereotype become a type of who we are and what we do? When does a certain pattern of choices or certain actions begin to define our identity? These are important questions...
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I Can Do It: Preschoolers and the Drive for Autonomy One of the main tasks of the toddler and preschool years is developing autonomy. This can be a great inconvenience to parents, who know that, for example, getting out the door would happen much faster if three-year-old Trevor didn't insist on dressing himself when he can't do the buttons, tying his own shoes when he doesn't know how, or struggling into his jacket without help…backwards. One of your jobs, as a parent, is to facilitate the emerging autonomy of your children. This doesn't mean suddenly abandoning your child to the mercy of his shoelaces, but it does mean supporting your child's drive to learn to do things himself. You can survive your child's growing autonomy by: 1. Planning ahead. Supporting fledgling independence means planning for more time to get out the door, allowing for tasks to be accomplished more slowly because of the "help" of your little apprentice, and taking care...
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Posted by on in Uncategorized
How to Help Your Children Wait Would you like to raise a patient child? (Wait…is that an oxymoron?) They say that patience is a virtue, but it’s a virtue that is hard for adults, let alone preschoolers. But waiting is a part of life, so we need to help our children learn to cope with it. An important first step is to set realistic expectations. It is easier for children to wait if they are expecting to wait. Set a timer where they can see it, and tell them, “We’ll go to Katie’s house/ have dinner/ play together in 10 minutes, when the timer beeps.” Let them know what’s coming next. Children get much more antsy when they don’t know what is going to happen. One important note: make sure you tell them in the order it will be happening. (Say, “First we’ll have a nap, then we’ll go to the park,” instead of “We’ll go to...
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